My best day thus far started with a fellow soldier stating that we needed to move out with our C.A.C. Card (Common Access Card, Card), and get in line to reset our P.I.N. Number (Personal Identification Number, Number) by 0800hrs. He proceeded to state "hurry hurry", mind you it is now 0500hrs! Excellent time management SGT, someone promote this guy.
As the high speed individual I am, I immediately ran down the hall to get in line, EXSPECIALLY since it came from the big Sarge (once again, someone promote this guy, NOW.) While attempting to locate the location (details, details) I had to get my map and myself ORIANTATED when I spotted a group of OCIFFERS and proceeded to ask "SIRS, where can I find the place to do the thing?" They replied, "be advised, it is approximately 2 millimeters mike mikes to your left o'clock, I REPEAT, YOUR LEFT O'CLOCK" I replied with "roger SIRS (obviously the proper term for addressing multiple SIRS), read you LIMA CHARLEY, over AND out....I copy, there's this road (toe drawing on dirt, on cement (not to me confused with seeeemen)) next to FOB Phoenix... OVER. Mind you this took place in 2 oh 8 (when the fuck was that!?) and then there's this road, completely irrelevant to where I needed to go, once again, details details.
Now that I've successfully pissed off 102% of the contributors on this blog, I will officially start (and end) my post with one last statement: On behalf of most of us, it's frustrating seeing highly competent individuals making reckless decisions. The overall sentiment can best be described by the link bellow.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fbGkxcY7YFU
GET SOME!
...In the but.
A few years ago, while watching a French Bulldog for the afternoon, I
ReplyDeletewitnessed an entertaining display of tenacity. I offered this creature a
frozen dog delicacy, which was about the size of one of those "cheap-o
brand" little ice cream cups, that come w/ the wooden spoon (essentially the
ice cream version of a Quarter Water). I assumed he would just lick at it
and push it around the kitchen linoleum flooring (which was also a pretty
crappy idea). Instead, he attempted to gobble the entire thing...whole.
That wasn't the impressive part, that came next. Obviously his efforts
forced him to choke (w/ great Frenchie alien burping/barking/hoarking sound)
and then puke-discharge the treat, then take a breath, and go at it again.
He followed this routine 3 times in a row, and each time the frozen treat
thawed a little in his throat and decreased in size. I think, all in all, it
took him about 8 times through to keep it down. He is a moron champion, too
stupid to quit, close to death, and ultimately successful.
While reading this post, I also performed this ritual, at least 5
times...with my brain. At each travesty I vomited my brain to the floor,
pooled it back up w/ my hands, and consumed it again, so that I could
continue. You successfully struck every nerve in my soul, you bastard. I do
like "left o'clock" though. Make it so!
Cheers